I think those among us who are not addictive cannot understand the pull of the demons. I come from an alcoholic family and I watched first-hand these demons ruin lives. I watched first-hand the devastating effects on the family of living with an addictive person. You cannot make an addictive person clean up his or her act. They have to hit bottom and then maybe, hopefully they will want to choose sobriety.
The brain chemicals in addictive people are different from those who are not. It’s not about choice. The impulses are too strong. The brain chemicals essentially say, “I want, I want” and it takes a clear and
true understanding when you are one of those people to learn to manage those impulses.Real addiction programs stress management and acceptance. Accept that you are powerless, and the “work” is in learning to manage the cravings. It’s the voice in the head that says, “If I do this, my life is going to fall apart and I will destroy all I have, and all I have worked for.”
That being said, sadly, not everyone makes it. The impulses are that strong… even when you know it just might destroy your life, the addictive person often cannot resist the impulses.
Addiction is a singular experience. No one can save the addict but themselves. The only help you can offer is love.